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It’s July 2012 and in the UK everyone’s thoughts are turning to the great sporting spectacle appearing over the horizon, that celebration of competition, that festival of sporting deeds…no not the Olympics (we’re all bored of them already). No, I mean the climax of the Staff Intramural 6-a-side league and specifically those legends of athleticism the Kickers!
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You can’t have failed to notice that there was a big game on last weekend – it featured a team who played their previous match without a recognised striker on the pitch and instead deployed a “false No 9”; a team who many have labelled as boring and predictable such is the relentlessness of their particular brand of football; a team who have created a new style of football never before witnessed and a team that ran out 4-0 winners in a laughably one-sided game……no not Spain and their namby -pamby “tika taka” nonsense! I refer of course to The Kickers who trounced Bosman Utd last Friday lunchtime.
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2012 will always be a special year in this blogger’s heart as my beloved Chelsea finally got their hands on that infernal Champions League trophy – and no I didn’t care that it was by playing some of the most defensive football ever witnessed to thwart the patently more gifted and stylish Barcelona and Bayern Munich teams.
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A mere two weeks after their meltdown at the hands of this week’s opponents that precipitated Gary Moore to fall on his sword, the Kickers were not only back but on the march. A sensational 2-1 victory against the much touted Sports centre team – this was one of those games where the scoreline belied the quality of the performance. The Kickers played with composure, intelligence and belief – three ingredients sadly missing a fortnight previous.
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Football history is littered with examples of the “phoenix club” – the term that describes the formation of a club following the demise of an existing club.
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This is not a wind up dear reader – Gary Moore has gone. It is the end of an era.
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The Kickers v Facilities (1230 GMT)
After last week’s dismal 1-5 reversal, the Kickers will start this return match as serious underdogs. Their early week optimism and defiance has turned to trepidation and doubt as kick off approaches.
Breaking: Last week’s strike force of Andy Hoole and Aaron Barwick have cried off and manager Gary Moore’s promise of a proper goalkeeper (i.e. a ringer) have turned out to be false with old timer John “Ned” Kelly on net duty.
Breaking 2: No proper keeper and no proper kit for The Kickers again – it’s those annoying red bibs for the lads once more.
Facilities Alan (“scab”) Hewett, Faz, Luka and some other blokes
Referee: Mr As If (Dreamland, Fantasyshire)
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Yaay..the 6-a-side league is back!
Err…not quite. This was a hastily arranged Friday lunchtime friendly..no team strip or owt…
No team strip – was it skins against shirts then?
Heavens no!!! The lads had their Mars Just Play bibs on over their individual shirts – so mercifully no sign of any flesh – middle age spread and all that…
I see…so what happened then?
They lost 5-1
Oi arsey! I can see the score for myself. Any chance of a quick match report?
The lads said they didn’t want one..given the result and all.
Sod that! Let’s have it…
But I promised….
Dickiebliss…the purveyor of truth and justice silenced by the deflated egos of a bunch of middle-aged losers? Say it ain’t so…
Well maybe I could just give them some marks out of 10 then…
That’s the spirit….what harm could that do?
Yes you’re right…Dickiebliss cannot be censored or sanitised… print and be damned and all that…
(Sound of hands being rubbed followed by a schadenfraude-filled chuckle)
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What’s this then? Thought the 6-a-side season hadn’t started yet. Well it hasn’t dear reader but this was something different …this was The Kickers in full on 11-a-side action.
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After a Summer of Tuesday lunchtime kick-a-bouts, The Kickers finally had a proper fixture albeit just a friendly. How did we know this was the real thing? Well the boys were in their full kit for one and secondly a 9 man squad had turned up for this game. Middle aged men just cannot resist even the merest hint of competitive edge – there is nothing more certain in the world – except perhaps that the Strictly Come Dancing line-up will feature at least one no-mark D-lister you’ve never heard of.
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