Filed under: Uncategorized
After returning to action the previous Sunday after weeks of inactivity, the Getupfront boys somehow managed to get a team out for the 2nd week running with perennial foes Pearson Park Pork Pies the opponents. Yet again it was touch and go whether the game would take place when Mike Ewen dropped out. Not having been able to get out of bed since Thursday morning after witnessing his beloved Liverpool’s laughable capitulation the previous evening in the Europa League final, Mike was still too depressed to play.
Fortunately the rest of the lads were made of sterner stuff (i.e. none of them are Liverpool fans) and it was a five fold force that took to the court including keeper Stuart Taylor who played despite it actually being his birthday (feel the shame Mike Ewen!).
Mike’s absence meant there was no sub for the night which was bad news for old timers Tony Ward and player manager Richard Bayliss who faced the prospect of 40 mins of wheezing, hyperventilating and near cardiac arrest.
Bayliss and Ward deciding whose turn it is to play up front.
The one up front at all times rule at least afforded them the chance to grab a few precious seconds respite although the sight of two middle aged men squabbling about whose turn it was to be the lone striker was truly pathetic.
Game 1: Getupfront 2-8 Pearson Park Pork Pies
The Pork Pies are a much younger bunch of guys and it wasn’t long before their youthful legs forged a 2 goal lead. Getupfront were adopting the currently popular Leicester City style of play by surrendering possession of the ball to the opposition and then trying to hit them on the break. Amazingly this tactic actually worked towards the end of the first half when Jay Robson skittered across the court surface on a helter-skelter of a crazy run after being released by Luke Ward when a PorkPies attack broke down.
Talking of balls being attached to you, hands up if you had one of these back in the day?…. Just me then.
With the ball seemingly surgically attached to him, Jay produced a clipped finish to send the boys into the break with a foothold back in the match.
Half time: Getupfront 1-2 Pearson Park Pork Pies
As regular followers of the fortunes of Getupfront will know, there is normally one half during the course of the 2 games played on a Sunday evening where it all goes tits up for the boys. This week it was the 2nd half of game 1. A 6 goal salvo by the Pork Pies without reply had keeper Stuart Taylor reflecting on where his life had gone wrong if this was the best activity he could find to do on his birthday. In a footnote to the game, Richard Bayliss maintained his Fernando Torresesque record of scoring completely pointless goals when he converted after being set up by Jay Robson.
The Bayliss goal may have been ultimately meaningless but it has nothing on this…the most pointless goal ever…
Full time: Getupfront 2-8 Pearson Park Pork Pies
Game 2: Getupfront 3-4 Pearson Park Pork Pies
It was a suitably chastened Getupfront who took to the court for the night’s 2nd game. However, having flushed their weekly turd of a half out of their systems already, the boys were ready to go again. Tony Ward started upfront after pulling rank (not to mention his groin) on fellow fitness struggler Bayliss and it was Tony who got with the Leicester City plan again when he notched a brilliant solo goal on the break to give the boys the lead for the first time in the evening. It was a goal Jamie Vardy would have been proud of and was not to be the last time that evening that we would be reminded of England’s goal hope for the Euros…..
Two quick Pork Pies goals meant he lead would not last until half time. Yet it could have been so different had a Jay Robson bullet found the back of the net and not the face of the opposition goalkeeper just before the break. Where’s Jamie Vardy when you need him…
Oh he’s here…go to 4:25 to see a great assist from the goalkeeper’s face for Vardy’s goal.
Half time: Getupfront 1-2 Pearson Park Pork Pies
The final half was perhaps the best of the night for our heroes. Luke Ward found an equaliser with an unusual goal when he initially claimed hand ball against a Pork Pies defender. When it wasn’t given and with the opposition player claiming his innocence, Luke decided to just play on and rattled in a superb shot.
Luke’s “distract the opposition by claiming handball and then play on” trick was good but not a patch on the master Brian Bason. Who? Go to 1:41 and see the greatest goal through deception ever…
However it couldn’t last and the tired Getupfront defence was beaten twice more before Jay Robson prodded home after Bayliss had fluffed an easier chance to ensure that they at least secured a battling draw for the final half of the evening even if the war was ultimately lost.
Full time: Getupfront 3-4 Pearson Park Pork Pies
How they rated
Stuart Taylor (GK)
It wasn’t exactly a party for birthday boy Stu, with 12 goals getting past him but if his birthday cake had a candle on it for every great save Stu has ever made the cake would have to be as big as Jamie Vardy’s ego. 8/10
If he was a Leicester City player he would be: Kasper Schmeichel – obviously although Stu has never ever been in anyone’s shadow unlike Kasper.
Richard Bayliss (Player Manager)
Standard stuff from Bayliss again this week – a few blocks, a few knocks and his usual smart red socks. 6/10
If he was a Leicester City player he would be: Robert Huth – big lump of a player that nobody can quite work out how he got to be a footballer.
Tony Ward
A fine goal and somehow not needing to be treated for severe exhaustion were Tony’s rewards for his endeavours this time around. 7/10
If he was a Leicester City player he would be: Leonardo Ulloa – reserve striker who warmed the bench for most of the season but never let anyone down when he was called on to fill in for Vardy.
Luke Ward
A cheeky goal and some hard running were Luke’s main contributions this week. 7/10
If he was a Leicester City player he would be: Marc Albrighton – unsung hero of the team. Always diligent, tremendous work rate, yet somehow always overshadowed by his Dad’s slapstick comedic performances as he masquerades as a footballer. Actually maybe Luke is more like Kasper Schmeichel come to think of it…
Jay Robson
The main goal threat yet again. Jay even relinquished his lone striker role to give Ward and Bayliss a breather and for that Jay you are this week’s…MOTM 9/10
If he was a Leicester City player he would be: Jamie Vardy – Jay plays with that single mindedness that Vardy does, once he sets his sights on goal he’s off at a pace and nothing will get in his way! Except being hungover from his stag do the other week. Where’s Danny Drinkwater to act as chaperone when you need him?
Filed under: Uncategorized
Now then what’s this? Getupfront actually playing a game of football? Having played just once in the last 2 months, the boys were finally back in action. So long had it been since an appearance at the Pro Soccer centre that you would have forgiven the staff there for copying the Chelsea fans that chanted “We forgot that you were here!” when Pato finally made his debut for the Blues.
Talking of debuts, last time out Aaron Barwick made his for Getupfront but in the intervening weeks, Mr Angry had already announced his retirement no doubt apoplectic with rage that he had been asked to play on a day with a “y” in it.
Game 1: Getupfront 4-3 KVFC
With player manager Bayliss delayed by a temperamental PDQ machine at Reception, the game kicked off with Tony Ward fulfilling the “old giffer” role for the boys. Opponents KVFC have a good record against our lads including a 14-8 cup semi final win back in Jan. However, revenge seemed an unlikely prospect in game 1 as KVFC took an early 2-0 lead.
Even angrier than Jay was this Sunderland fan who has just woken up after a night on the lash and seen the tattoo his mates had done for him whist he was out for the count.
Despite being without Angry Aaron, Getupfront did have another player incandescent with rage in Jay Robson who was decidedly miffed about his beloved Newcastle Utd having been relegated in the week and was running around furiously up top. Powered by his seething sense of injustice, Jay singlehandedly showed those namby pamby millionaire playboy wasters at St James Park how to do it when he skewered an excellent solo goal.
Half time: Getupfront 1 – 2 KVFC
With Stu Taylor pulling off save after spectacular save, Getupfront were level in the 2nd half when Jay “man possessed” Robson struck again after some good support play from genial scouser Mike Ewen. But then…a personal disaster for young Luke Ward when he inadvertently deflected a KVFC shot past keeper Taylor to register an own goal. Gulp! Undeterred and without needing a reassuring hug from his Dad Tony, Luke dusted himself down and was soon back in the action playing in Jay Robson to round the keeper and strike a second equaliser.
No its not Tony Ward commiserating with son Luke, its Eidur Gudjohnsen replacing his Dad Aarnor for Iceland!
As the timer counted down the last few seconds, pandemonium broke out on the court as Ewen found himself on the corner of the area with time to line up a shot. Only Mike will know if he meant what transpired but instead of hitting the back of the net his effort found Jay Robson for a simple tap in. BOOM! The timer showed 0:00 and KVFC appealed that Robson was in the orange box when he applied the crucial touch and the goal should not have stood but it mattered not a jot. The ref indicated a GOAL! and Getupfront had a precious victory.
Full time: Getupfront 4 – 3 KVFC
Game 2: Getupfront 3-10 KVFC
Ah… the 2nd game…what about the 2nd game you say? Was there a 2nd game this week?Nah don’t think there was…..*everyone involved in the 2nd game gets off sharpish*
How they rated
Stuart Taylor (GK)
The supreme custodian of the nets, Stu was his usual committed self with plenty of “FFS”s every time a shot did get past him. Unlike John McEnroe I don’t think he was taking to himself though!
Richard Bayliss (Player Manager)
Played his usual game…meaning he hung around the back keeping himself to himself and occasionally got in the opposition’s way. Oh wait…wait… there was one other thing…he somehow managed to be the only player other than Jay Robson to score when he turned home the last Getupfront goal of the night in the 2nd game from point blank range. 7/10
Tony Ward
He turned up, he man-marked furiously, he went home. 7/10
Luke Ward
Not Luke’s best night with his only goal being that of the “own” variety but as ever he was combative and full of purpose when in possession of the ball. Can someone remember to point him the right direction next week though.7/10
Mike Ewen
Mike assured Dickiebliss in the car on the way home that he made at least two (count ’em) assists during the course of the night. Two assists…hmm…whats the going rate for an assist these days? *sound of the Dickiebliss 5-a-side bible being thumbed* OK – for that Mike you can have …8/10
Jay Robson
Someone should wind Jay up every week if this is how he performs when he’s angry. He’s like a footballing Hulk… the opposition don’t like him when he’s angry 9/10 MOTM
Filed under: Getupfront
After a 5 week break the Getupfront boys were finally back in action. After a shortfall in numbers recently, manager Bayliss was taking no chances this week and bumped up the squad up to a massive 7 (that’s seven!) players. This multitude of talent also included new signing Aaron Barwick making his debut. A journey man footballer of many a team, Barwick has a reputation as being an angry player – everything annoys him on the pitch – the opposition, the ref, his team mates, his shorts…how would he fair strutting his stuff for Getupfront?
Game 1: Getupfront 6-3 Bradford’s Maaam
It turns out that the opposition,Bradford’s Maaam, are a mathematically challenged team and had turned up for a 5-a-side game with only 4 players. Fortunately Getupfront manager Bayliss is rather better with numbers and quickly worked out that 7 is 2 more than 5 and therefore he could afford to relinquish one of his squad to play for the opposition. The Bradford boys took a long hard look at the prime athletes (and Tony Ward) in front of them and ludicrously decided they didn’t need any of them and would play with a man down. What a bunch of ingrates! OK so if that’s how its going to be….
“Into this lot!” bellowed Barwick at kick off but it was his new team mates who were quickly on the back foot despite their numerical advantage. Some slick passing from the organised Bradford’s Maaam saw our brave heroes 0-1 down early on. Luke Ward stabbed home an equaliser soon after but more defensive sloppiness meant the boys went in 2-1 down at half time.
When a 3rd goal went in shortly after the break all looked lost at 1-3. With just 5 minutes left on the clock, Bayliss produced a managerial masterstroke and subbed himself and Tony Ward, the two oldest codgers on the team (combined age 97), leaving his youngest legs on the court to test a clearly tiring and man down opposition.
Barwick’s frustration with proceedings had clearly reached boiling point and he flew at the opposition, hurling himself into the action like Jamie Vardy on speed. What followed was a veritable shit storm of goals as Getupfront banged in 5 without reply to win the game 6-3. The returning Jay Robson, clearly buzzing after his precious Newcastle United finally realised they were supposed to be a professional football team the day before, helped himself to a hat-trick with the increasingly dependable Luke Ward adding his second of the game. And what of Barwick? Aaron finally broke his duck with a last minute stooping header to capitalise on Luke Ward’s fine cross.
Game 2: Getupfront 3-1 Bradford’s Maaam
By the time of the 2nd game, Bradford’s Maaam were obviously feeling the effects of playing with a man down and Getupfront were able to keep them at arm’s length quite comfortably. As hard as they tried to get a foothold in the match ultimately it was a futile endeavour. A bit like watching Roberto Martinez trying to convince the world (and himself) that he is a good football manager by constantly referring to everything as “phenomenal” – it was never going to work. Sure enough the Getupfronters went into the half time break with a 2-0 lead courtesy of goals from Barwick and Luke Ward.
This man has a phenomenal head of hair
The 2nd half saw more of the same and the boys knocked up a 3rd when Jay Robson fluked a goal after his initial attempt to round the goalie, rebounded off first the keeper and then himself before nestling in the back of the net.
And that was that..until the human octopus that is Mike Ewen decided hew as actually a Harlem Globetrotter rather than a Scouser and handballed in the area. The resulting penalty was duly despatched but it made little difference ultimately as Getupfront racked up a 3rd consecutive win.
How they rated
Stuart Taylor (GK)
Superb again – we’re running out of superlatives for Stu- oh hang on lets ask Roberto Martinez…
If he were a rapper he would be:
Flava Flav – best known for his his signature normal size clock worn as a fashion accessory. Stu on the other hand did’t need a clock to call time on the oppositions’s goal haul letting in just a measly 4 in 40 minutes of game time. 9/10 MOTM
Richard Bayliss (Player Manager)
Hmm…don’t remember him doing much at all…lets check his stats *sound of OPTA stats book being thumbed* Bayliss…Bayliss……ah, Bayliss…hmm…there are no stats just a picture of a donkey. 6/10
If he were a rapper he would be:
Vanilla Ice – Enjoyed a brief moment in the sun 25 years ago and then turned into a joke, derided by all of his peers. Whatever happened to Vanilla Ice though? 6/10
Tony Ward
Hat trick hero last time out but a repeat performance was about as likely as Nigel Farage appearing on TV wearing a t-shirt with his tax return printed on it.
If he were a rapper he would be:
MC Hammer – one is an embarrassment mostly remembered for his ridiculous baggy pants. The other is MC Hammer. 7/10
Luke Ward
Proving himself to be a reliable goalscorer is our Luke. And he’d been out celebrating his birthday the night before. Now that’s commitment for you.
If he were a rapper he would be:
Snoop Doggy Dog – Luke sniffed out his chances like a dog sniffing out a bone and (ahem) buried them. 8/10
Mike Ewen
Genial scouser Mike is a popular guy and not only with his teammates but also with the opposition when he literally handed them a penalty late on. Despite that, it was another impressive performance. Boss la’! 8/10
If he were a rapper he would be:
John Barnes – Hardly the “master plan” but Mike did most of his good work “round the back”, holding, breaking up play and generally cajoling his team mates onto ever greater efforts. 8/10
Aaron Barwick
Good debut from Angry Aaron including 2 goals. Fitted in seamlessly with his new team mates – could he be softening in his old age?
If he were a rapper he would be:
MC Tunes – hard as nails Mancunian. “The only rhyme that bites” was apparently inspired by Aaron. 8/10
Jay Robson
Back from injury and it was like he’d never been away- his 4 goals made him top scorer for the night.
If he were a rapper he would be:
LLCool J – obviously. With his laconic style and dead-eye finishing, Jay was coolness personified. 8/10
Tony rides into battle
Ward declares war on pork pies
Think you’ve seen it all in this topsy-turvy season? Do you believe nothing can match Leicester City’s tilt at the title for sheer unexpectedness? Or that there has never been a bigger shock than Chelsea’s catastrophic defence of their Premier League crown? Then you are wrong in all of your assumptions for last Sunday an event so seismic in its element of surprise that it literally blew the minds of all who were there to witness it. You may want to be seated before you read the next sentence…..Tony Ward scored a hat-trick….in one game! A proper, bona fide, game-changing hat-trick!
I know…I know….how could this possibly be you are asking yourself. Tony? Tony Ward? The very last word in “really should know better at his age”players? The over-the-hill footballers over -the -hill footballer? Yes…Yes…..and thrice YES! Tony Ward did this..for he is Spartacus and he led you here….
Game 1: Getupfront 1-5 Pearson Park Pork Pies
Game 1 but game 11 in fact for Getupfront under the stewardship of new boss Richard Bayliss. Following the shock resignation of previous manager Mike Lines, it has been a mixed bag under the new regime. The previous 10 games had yielded 1 win, 2 draws on 7 losses. Nothing to write about there (err.. except I am writing about it) and with a bare bones squad of 5 and no subs again this week, hopes of adding to that solitary win looked as likely as …well a Tony Ward hat-trick. But this is season 2015-16 and seemingly anything can happen. Yet it seemed to be the same old same old in game 1 as Getupfront created nothing going forward in the first half and deservedly trailed 0-3 at the break.
The second half at least saw them register on the scoreboard with a smart finish from Luke Ward after a route 1 pass from keeper Stu Taylor bisected the Pork Pies defence. But it wasn’t enough to affect the final result and the game was up as the Pies rattled in 2 more goals to run out easy winners.
Game 2: Getupfront 5 – 4 Pearson Park Pork Pies
The first half of the 2nd game has traditionally been a weak spot for the Getupfronters and the usual collapse looked on again as they were quickly 0-1 down once more. But then a bolt form the blue – a goal form Tony Ward! Sure it was a scuffed finish and Tony was only up front because his legs had given up on him (again) but somehow he forced the ball over the line and the lads were level. With the defence being expertly marshalled by the ever talkative Mike Ewen and with Stu Taylor repelling anything that came near him (including his own team mates on occasion), parity was maintained until the last 40 seconds of the half when 2 goals were shipped . The second was a personal calamity for Ewen who got sacked in his own half quicker than you could say “Steve McClaren” and Taylor for once was unable to prevent the inevitable outcome of a goal in the against column.
And then….cometh the hour cometh the middle-aged man….enter goal hero Tony Ward. After a quick check by Boss Bayliss on the state of Tone’s knees, the decision was taken to keep Ward up front and it turned out to be an inspired decision. Another long punt up front direct from the boot of keeper Taylor allowed Ward in on goal and he finished with unerring aplomb right into the corner. Game on! And then game level as our Tone cut in from the left and arrowed a delicious toe poke passed the opposition goalie. It was a special moment for Ward and a career first hat-trick.
Not to be outdone by his old man, son Luke Ward then conjured up a delightful headed goal, nonchalantly flicking on yet another Taylor “ave it!” pass. The crowd – had there been one – would have been in uproar. This was fantasy football and it got even better when Ewen finished smartly to atone for his previous error with another strike to send Getupfront 5-3 up. 4 goals without reply! There was still time for Tony to remind us what he was really all about when he missed a sitter and a late Pork Pies goal provoked some desperate defending by our brave heroes but nothing was going to deprive them and Ward in particular of their triumph. We may never see its like again.
How they rated
Stuart Taylor (GK)
Ever dependable, Stu bizarrely added assists to his game with 3 in one night. 8/10
If he were a terrace chant he would be:
“We’ve got something you’ve not got,we’ve got something you’ve not got,we’ve got something you’ve not got, we’ve got Stewie Taylor!”
Mike Ewen
Rapidly becoming an very important part of the squad, Scouser Mike was a reassuring presence , always available for a pass, always talking and his goal turned out to be the winner. 8/10
If he were a terrace chant he would be:
“He’s fast, he’s hard, he talks like Steve Gerrard, Mike Ewen Mike Ewen”
Richard Bayliss (Player Manager)
The boss played his usual game of just getting in everyone’s way – the law of averages mean that every now and again this worked as he provided a stout obstacle for the opposition. 7/10
If he were a terrace chant he would be:
“Where were you when you were shit?*
* where he always was and continues to be – right side of the defence looking bewildered
Luke Ward
On any other night we would have been talking about his marvellous header but the evening belonged to his Dad….8/10
If he were a terrace chant he would be:
“He scores when he wants, he scores when he wants, Luke Ward he scores when he wants”
Tony Ward
A legendary night for Tony. Three goals and a story to bore his grand kids with for years to come. “Did I ever tell you about the time I scored a hat trick kids?”….9/10 MOTM
If he were a terrace chant he would be:
“Tony Ward my Lord Tony Ward, oh Lord Tony Ward”
Filed under: Uncategorized
Click and play this before reading any further….
Welcome to the Dickiebliss Gallery – a repository for interactive Kickers related resources. Wonder at the cutting edge art nouveau installations, be amazed at the bewildering array of….oh OK its just some Youtube clips of last weeks Kickers futsal match…enjoy….
First up a clip which sees the lads go one down almost immediately – bit like varnish this goal – lovely finish
Oh this is fabulous – not the action which is fairly non-descript but the commentary from those two old giffers Tony Ward and Richard Bayliss is priceless – Tony recounts his current ailment but Bayliss won’t be outdone in the pathetic injuries stakes
More unintentional hilarity from Tony Ward on the sidelines – this time his words of encouragement sound like he’s taking his dogs for a walk – “Come on boys…come on” …marvellous. As for the action, Luke Ward manages to get a shot on target (as his Dad inevitably confirms for him) and at the end of the clip Michael Latham shows how to deal with gallic fancy footwork although he seems as surprised as anyone that it worked.
Now then – some genuinely arty stuff here as the French lads score again – not sure which is more artistic, their finely crafted goal or the unusual camera angle – check it out.
From top end high art to well… the ridiculous – some top drawer slapstick goalkeeping from John Kelly
Finely! Some footage of Equipe Ruby that doesn’t end up in a goal against the Kickers – in fact its indisputable evidence that they are human after all!
This is how you do it…nearly. Aaron Barwick shows the French boys the way with his volleying technique.
And so we come to the end of the exhibition and as we do, also to the end of this little stint of Kickers vs Equipe Ruby matches as the French lads have packed up and gone home for Christmas. And it has been a truly life affirming experience. A group of (mostly) young men meeting up each week to exchange different cultures and ideas. The Kickers for their part gave the French lads a shining example of togetherness in very difficult conditions whilst their gallic counterparts gave the Kickers…well a good hammering each week mostly. But this final week they gave the Kickers one other thing…the Man of the match award. Yes, in an unexpected twist, Dickiebliss asked Matthias the French captain to nominate a Kickers MotM and after consulting with his teammates, I can announce that the winner is…..
*drum roll*
….LUKE WARD!
Many congratulations to Luke who wins a free two hour coaching session with his Dad Tony….oh….
Filed under: Uncategorized
After last week’s bizarre dating blog received a luke warm reception, Dickiebliss has gone traditional this time around with a retro themed match report. None of this twittter nonsense. No thank you to rolling SkySports news and their intensely annoying practice of making the last day of the transfer window into a 24 hour jamboree of tales of potential signings being sighted rocking up at training grounds. I reject players in pink football boots and detest their anaemic “media-trained to within an inch of their lives” post match interviews. No…I crave the days of football being played by proper men in proper football strips, a time when there was only Match of the Day (and not Match of the Day 2 and MOTD2 Extra) and if you missed it, it was gone forever with no iPlayer repeats or + 1 channels. A time of transistor radios for keeping up to date with scores from other games not iPhones updating you constantly. This is when football really mattered….this is the football of the 70s and 80s!
err…hang on Dickie….if you are serious about getting in your time machine and travelling back to your beloved 70s/80s, then you can’t be using any youtube clips or indeed the format of this blog at all seeing as they didn’t exist back then (Nostalgia Ed)
Damn! OK..OK…forget the 70s and 80s ….here’s some clips of what happened the other night.
To recap, the Kickers got well beat in the first game as usual despite a spirited second half showing which they only lost 8-5 (after being 9-1 down at half time).
And no…the second result up there in the blog heading is not a typo – the Kickers finally beat those French guys 8-7 and yes our boys did play with a man extra. Do you wanna make something of it?
Ned Kelly to the rescue again
And to think this man let in 24 goals in one evening despite being this good between the sticks… Kickers defenders hang your heads in shame
Mike Ewen threads a pass through the eye of a needle
A rare piece of footage has emerged in which Mike Ewen displays some football talent. Don’t believe me? Then click below and believe your own eyes!
Richard Bayliss in lack of commitment shocker
Andy Hoole said at half time in the first game that the Kickers main problem was that they were lazy and didn’t track back. Andy – how could you?! This cannot be true! Or can it? Click below to hear a shocking revelation from Richard Bayliss on the sidelines. Also, if you watch right to the very end you see Andy Hoole chancing his arm from his own penalty area.
Andy Hoole clears off the line
It may look like shambolic defending but this was one of the few Equipe Ruby chances that got away
Robert Sherratt’s poor pass leads to a goal against the Kickers
There’s not much else to be said about this – sorry Robert – the camera never lies
Robert Sherratt with another poor pass
Oh dear – anyone would think Robert was being picked on….
Andy Hoole effort
Well it wouldn’t be a clip montage without some more of Andy Hoole would it?
How they performed:
Ned Kelly:
If he were a footballer from the 70s or 80s he would be: Gary Sprake
Sprake’s autobiography is called “Careless Hands” in recognition of his reputation as a brilliant goalkeeper who was prone to some appalling mistakes. Ned was his usual able self but at least one of those 24 goals conceded was his fault!
Nostalgia factor: 7/10
Richard Bayliss
If he were a footballer from the 70s or 80s he would be: Ray Wilkins
Richard’s boyhood hero started off life as the swasbuckling young “Butch” Wilkins spearheading a youthful yet talented Chelsea team. However, it is in his “crab” phase where the comparison with Bayliss begins. In a 5 year Kickers career, Richard has yet to make a forward pass.
Nostalgia factor: 6/10
Robert Sherratt:
If he were a footballer from the 70s or 80s he would be: Billy Whitehurst
“Skill Bill” became a cult figure at every club he played for. A former bricklayer, he is considered one of the games true hard men and what he lacked in finesse he made up for in brute force. Sherratt showed his own steel when performing a perfect block tackle on that tall French lad who, and this is the only apt phrase, “didn’t like it up him”.
Nostalgia factor: 7/10
Tony Ward
If he were a footballer from the 70s or 80s he would be: Tony Ward
There’s only one Tony Ward…obviously
Nostalgia factor: 7/10
Luke Ward
If he were a footballer from the 70s or 80s he would be: Norman Whiteside
The original boy wonder. Back in the day , you couldn’t whisper Whiteside’s name without mentioning his age and that other legendary Irish Man United star George Best. Luke is undoubtedly the new kid on the Kickers block but we don’t think he would like to be mentioned in the same breath as that other Kickers legend – his Dad Tony.
Nostalgia factor: 8/10
Mike Ewen
If he were a footballer from the 70s or 80s he would be: Ian Callaghan
857 senior appearances for Liverpool but can anyone remember anything he ever did in all those games? Similarly Mike….well you don’t need me to join up the dots on this one do you?
Nostalgia factor: 6/10
Andy Hoole
If he were a footballer from the 70s or 80s he would be: Gerd Muller
Known as “Der Bomber” because of his stocky figure, short legs and low centre of gravity, Gerd was one of the most prolific goal scorers of his generation. Probably never got the recognition he deserved and often overlooked when the Best Player Ever lists are compiled. Well we can’t have that happen to the Andy Hoole whose 5 (or was it 6?) goals over the two games make him the Kickers Man of the Match.
Nostalgia factor: 8/10
Filed under: Uncategorized
As the headline suggests, the Kickers were involved in 2 games last week when they took part in a round robin competition with two other teams. In honour of the round -robin structure and because Dickiebliss is a bit pushed for time this week – the blog is going round robin also in the form of speed blogging. Its a bit like speed dating but without the embarrassment….having said that…..
Filed under: Uncategorized
There are some rules of life that are undeniable.
The only certainties in life are death and taxes?
Yes but here are a few more that raised their ugly heads in last nights futsal pre tournament ‘friendly’ fixture:
1. A game of football, without a ref, inevitably descends into a confrontation between the two teams
2. There’s always showing off when a team brings along girlfriends to watch
3. Men over 40 should not play football against 18 year olds
Filed under: Uncategorized
Here they come – the champions, the invincibles, the undefeated, sweeping all before them in a deluge of goals… the one and only Kickers! These boys have become Wednesday night legends – each one a household name – why here’s prime mover Rich Kirk notching another couple of goals to add to his bulging tally and burgeoning reputation. Over there is Robert Sherratt helping himself to more goal glory with a close range (albeit scuffed) finish. And if I’m not mistaken isn’t that Paul Andrews the (almost forgotten) Kicker , missing since the first game but now back for the final chapter to ensure he doesn’t miss out on all the fun, spraying passes around the pitch like he’s never been away. Not forgetting Azza Barwick, Andy Hoole , Mike Ewen…so many names inspiring so many memories. All the gang are here! And what better way to finish this title winning season than by cruising to yet another victory….
Full time: The Kickers 3 – 0 East Rangers
Except…that isn’t really what occurred last Wed night last…IS IT LADS?!
Filed under: Getupfront
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